


Last first kiss

by Louvie



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alpha Harry, Alpha Zayn, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Beta Liam, Beta Niall, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Louis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-18
Updated: 2015-12-17
Packaged: 2018-05-07 07:16:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5447912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Louvie/pseuds/Louvie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The boy standing in front of the truck looked exactly like the boy in the pictures his future mother in law had sent. Curly hair with a green headscarf tied around it and broad shoulders. Louis did what his instincts told him to.</p>
<p>He ran away.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Last first kiss

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bottomlouiswriter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bottomlouiswriter/gifts).



> Hii! I'm sorry this is a little late, when I started planning for this fic I forgot I was a pinch hitter. I wanted to write a fic where Harry and Louis relationship progressed slowly but time and inspiration led me down a different route. It’s divided into 2 chapters, this one is more as an introduction to their universe and story and the second one… I guess you’ll see :) Also I’ve tried to not stray too far away from the prompt, hope you enjoy it!
> 
> I’d like to thank Kara and Mariah for being such wonderful beta’s (this wouldn’t be anywhere close to good or readable without you and I'm very grateful) and Elena for being an amazing cheerleader and friend in need xx

It was in the middle of July, a particularly hot day, when Louis had just finished playing football with some of his friends when his mother called him and forced him to come home. He was wiping his face with the part of his shirt that wasn't covered in sweat when he noticed something out of the ordinary. The big red house that had been vacant for two years had moving trucks in front of it, a boy and a girl of approximately the same age talking beside it. When he got a little bit closer to the house, the boy turned around, walking towards Louis to get something from a car nearby.

Realisation hit Louis hard and for a second he forgot how to breathe. The boy standing in front of the truck looked exactly like the boy in the pictures his future mother in law had sent. Curly hair with a green headscarf tied around it and broad shoulders. He couldn’t see much more but watching the way Harry looked in his direction he knew that his mother had been sending pictures too. So Louis, not able to deny his omega-traits in distress, did what his instincts told him to.

He ran away.

 

 

 

For as long as he could remember he’d been promised to Harry Styles. The arrangement had taken place when they were three years old and still living within the same pack. Until Harry’s mother remarried and took him and his sister to join another pack in New York.

 

Being in an arranged marriage wasn’t unheard of or foreign. Almost all of his schoolmates had their own ring, symbolising their future marriage and unity. The only difference was that his mate had moved away from Doncaster.

Even if his arrangement fit the norm, Louis was not your typical omega. He didn’t want to fall into the stereotype of the submissive omega waiting at home for his alpha.

In school he played football and studied drama - subjects usually restricted to alphas. He was glad he had a supportive mother because he knew some of the older residents in town frowned upon. He had heard the whispers and knew a lot of them expected Harry’s family to end the engagement.

Even though he would never admit it, he was afraid for the same thing. He'd never been good at dealing with rejection and his mother would be so sad. She and Harry’s mother Anne had been neighbours and best friends. No matter how rebellious he was in school, he’d never do anything to intentionally hurt her.

 

Sometimes, when he was being particularly pitiful, he’d admit his fears to his mother. She had kept contact with Anne through the years but they had decided it was better for both Harry and Louis to stay away from each other until the time was right. Louis’s mother insisted on describing Harry as the sweetest and kindest alpha Louis would ever meet. And in a weird way that frightened him more.

A year ago his mother told him that Harrys pack had changed their plans and moved to Doncaster earlier than expected, meaning Louis and Harry would be meeting again soon. Louis had tried not to think about it since then and worked twice as hard on the football field. His grades had suffered a bit but he was the first omega to make it to team captain so he was proud, no matter what his stepfather tried to tell him.

 

 

 

Louis didn't get very far. His house was just a few blocks away. When he did return home his whole body was shaking. He went into the shower, thankful that the house was empty and tried to calm his racing heart. It was difficult, the water temperature never right, no matter how he twisted the knobs.

He finished eventually, taking much longer than he normally would, the house was no longer empty. After dressing quickly Louis went downstairs, the smell of food making his stomach growl.

In the kitchen he found his mother busy finishing the last of the dinner. They made eye contact and she looked at him annoyed. “It wouldn’t hurt if you helped around at home. It’s summer break…”

Louis tuned her out and wordlessly started setting the table. The shock still hadn’t faded. Jay gave him a look but decided to leave him alone.

His sisters started coming into the kitchen just as Louis finished setting the table. Louis felt bad for not helping out more at home. His mother’s new husband, Daniel, was off on a business trip. His mother was taking care of the six of them alone at times and Louis had just found out she was three months pregnant. It was still a secret but he’d learned it was twins. It was amazing news, he really did love his sisters.

After making sure everyone had food, he sat down and looked up for the first time. Lottie was sitting in front of him, 11 years old and already trying to act like a teenager. Her glitter lipstick was all over her face, some blue eyeshadow had fallen onto her cheek. She only stuck her tongue out when he winked at her and pointed at his lips. Next to her was Felicity, who had more mismatched colours on her face. The twins, Phoebe and Daisy, were next to them. They wore identical clothes but in different colours. Louis’s appetite hadn’t yet returned, still too shaken up.

“So Louis, did you see something interesting on your way home today?” his mother asked after listening to a lengthy story from one of his sisters. Louis could feel the blood rushing to his face and heard the giggle coming from Lottie. He looked up and saw all the girls looking at him with mirth in their eyes. So they all knew?

“No, why are you asking?” he replied shortly. The twins looked at him and continued eating, more interested in talking to each other. Fizzy started laughing and Lottie looked self-conscious after he tried to stare her down. He avoided looking at his mother, feeling embarrassment taking over.

Louis sulked. He looked at girls surrounding his table with a frown. They all laughed at him, which only made him frown more.

“I’m sorry boo but I had no idea how to tell you. I didn’t want you to freak out.” Jay chuckled, not really looking very sorry at all.

“Looou, do you know that we passed by your alpha’s house today? He lives really close by and his house seems to be so nice!” was shouted out by Daisy who looked excitedly at Louis. She and Phoebe started talking and it didn’t take long for them to start shouting.

“Why do you care if they get married in a week? You’re still not going to be the flower girl!” Phoebe looked angry and Daisy let out a shriek, shocking both Louis and his mother.

“You’re too stupid to be a flower girl! I’m the prettiest one so you...” Daisy started but was shut down by Jay.

“Both of you - stop! If you continue to argue then neither one of you will attend the wedding. I’m sure there’s a lot of pretty and _nice_ little girls in Harry’s pack that would make amazing flower girls, don’t you?” She lifted a brow. The effect was instant. Both girls frowned and looked down at their plates shamefully. Lottie tried to reason with them, telling them they hadn’t considered the option of both of them being flower girls.

Flower girls. At his wedding. To Harry Styles. Who recently moved back to Doncaster.

The butterflies in his stomach were back and making it hard to focus. The lasagne both looked and tasted delicious but Louis just couldn’t get the prickling feeling off his skin, felt like walking off to get his breathing under control.

This was the biggest reason why it sucked to be an omega. Whenever he started to panic, his mind began feeling foggy. A biological sensitivity that would intensify when he mated and became more dependent on his alpha, needing his scent or touch to calm him down. Being unmated, the effect wasn’t strong but still there.

Looking up he noticed not only his mother’s but also Fizzy’s concerned stare. He didn’t want to be in the kitchen anymore, not when every breath felt like a monumental accomplishment.

So he did the same thing he’d done a couple of hours ago. He ran into his room without saying anything and buried himself under the cover of his blanket. The foggy part of his brain was taking over and he tried to breathe. This continued until he finally fell asleep.

 

 

 

Harry woke up with a strange feeling. Everything was different and he hadn't yet adjusted. Being an alpha he didn't like being in an unknown place. To make matters worse, they didn’t just move to a different city but a different country. He was just thankful he didn’t have to learn a new language.

The rest of his pack were on their way and the plan was for them all to be moved in and ready before school started in September. Harry turned on the inflatable mattress and saw the back of his sister's head from across the room, sleeping peacefully. He envied her. It was four in the morning and he couldn’t sleep for more than one hour at a time.

It was hard to find sleep again. The uneasy feeling intensified and he was wide awake. Harry tried to think about boring things, like what shade of blue his walls should be or how many boxes they had to unpack. It had taken a week but his mother was satisfied, claiming it was “liveable” and “almost done”. Enough so that she already planned a dinner party. Meaning that in 13 hours he would meet Louis, whom he didn't know much about when he thought about it.

Harry had seen a lot of pictures of Louis. Most of them were pictures his mum Joannah probably took of him when he wasn't aware that a picture was being taken, at weddings and summer days with his sisters. The most recent ones were pictures of Louis playing football. It was unusual for an omega to play any sport that involved physical strength but also closeness to alphas.

Most pictures were of Louis profile or far away except for one where Louis was standing behind one of his sisters, the eldest one perhaps. It was Harry's favourite because Louis was smiling and his blue eyes shone through the photo.

Harry always felt a strange loyalty to the boy in the pictures. He was eleven when he received the picture that made him fall in love with the colour blue. The nerves that overtook his body felt overwhelming.

What if Louis looked even more stunning in person? His mother never let him read the letters she got from Jay, no matter how much he begged. According to her, Louis was described as a kind, warm person with a persona that took over the room. He remembers that description because he never understood what she meant, he'd only met shy and quiet omegas. His mother always laughed at him and told him he'd have to find out on his own.

But he was also worried. What if Louis was kind and funny, charming everyone except for Harry because Harry might not be alpha enough for him?

Harry was quiet and shy – not words one would traditionally ascribe to an alpha. Luckily he was tall and had defined muscles but he was still skinnier than most. His hair was long, probably longer than Louis’s.

He fiddled with his ring, something that always comforted him, and felt wide awake with panic now. He looked at the phone again, four twenty four. Gemma turned around in bed and Harry put it away.

He listened to his sister's breathing and soon found sleep, feeling his worry draping over him like a blanket and following into his sleep.

 

 

 

“Harry stop, stop! I told you, the china we got from your grandmother not this... what is this?” His mother’s voice could be heard from the hallway as she ran around. Gemma looked at him and laughed. Harry had been put in charge of setting the table and wasn’t doing a good job at all, it seemed like.

He didn't care about her outbursts, his own nervousness taking over. Louis and his family was coming over in less than one hour. The moment he’d been waiting for was slowly approaching.

So, Harry played it safe. He put on a pair of black jeggings and black socks, checking three times to make sure he didn’t have holes in them. He found one t-shirt that was stylish enough. It was a white one with hands holding cigarettes. As he was tying a headscarf around his head when Gemma walked by, looked at him briefly and said, “you know Louis isn’t coming alone, right? Wonder what his parent’s will say,” as she walked to the living room.

Panic took over and he quickly changed into a lavender one instead, that had a pocket with a red heart and lover spelled on it. Perhaps it wasn’t the most alpha clothes he could pick out, but at the same time he didn’t want to dress like somebody else. Harry looked down at his clothes, sighed and started going back downstairs to help his mother. Anything to keep his mind occupied.

 

 

 

Louis was running out of what little luck he used to have in his life. His mother was anxious about the dinner and the impression her family would make. So much so that she made them all dress up as if they were attending a royal dinner.

The girls all wore their prettiest formal dresses and had been fixing each other's hair all day long. Daniel was patiently trying to calm his mother down who seemed to find problems everywhere, most of them in Louis.

He was sitting down, having his hair styled by his mother, dressed in a nice white shirt and black pants. One of the many catastrophes that had taken place today was when Louis trousers kept falling down or sat too tight. None of his jeans were acceptable as he didn't know who in the house was the happiest when she finally found a pair of black braces.

He looked in the mirror, making a face to one of his sisters who was staring, thinking not for the first time that they probably were going to be really overdressed. He didn’t have time to dwell over it, his mother voice disturbing his thoughts. She was using these last moments before the big appearance to tell him all the things he should, but more importantly, shouldn’t do.

It was too late, anyway. Louis was already too forward, too loud, too obnoxious to be seen as the typical nice and well behaved omega. And his mother really didn't have to remind him of all his faults right before the big dinner, making him feel less worthy of his potential mate. Because, even if he didn’t act like an omega, he couldn’t deny his DNA. He got heats, had to take suppressants, felt bad when he was told he was behaving badly and felt proud when he was told he was good. So why did he not act like his mother wanted?

It was with these thoughts and a heavy heart that he found himself standing behind Jay and Daniel, already annoyed with his sisters who had teased him on his way over, waiting for the door to be opened.

It was opened almost immediately by an alpha who had kind eyes and a tall frame. “I don’t believe we’ve met before” his dark voice said, mainly to his parents. The adults exchanged words and then his parents started walking into the house. He shook hands with Harry’s stepfather and noticed his hands were shaking pretty badly. The man also noticed and gave him a weak smile.

Louis took a shaky breath and toed off his shoes and jacket. The hallway became crowded quickly and at the end stood the rest of Harry’s family. Louis knew he was stalling and that meeting Harry was inevitable. With a push from Lottie he stumbled forward and stood next to his mother. First he saw a woman, presumably Anne, and next to her a girl around the age of 20 with blonde hair. Anne introduced herself and he shook her hand, blushing because he could see Harry watching him from the corner of his eye and Louis still hadn’t acknowledged him. After Anne came Harry’s sister Gemma who gave him a big smile and a wink. Louis could feel his blush deepen and took a deep breath.

He looked at Harry’s hand and accepted it.

Looking up, the first thing he saw was curly hair and red cheeks. Harry was biting his lip and looking at him with big, green eyes. Ever the cliché, Louis felt a spark from his toes up to his hair, making his blush intensify. Harry gave him a small smile and he could see a hint of dimples.

Louis let out a small shaky breath. Harry mouthed, “me too,” and Louis gave a startled laugh. They let go of each other’s hand but continue staring.

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” Harry said after being pinched by his mother. Louis didn’t trust his voice, didn’t think he can speak so he nods instead.

It's Harry's mother that ended the moment, ushering everyone into the dining room where Louis was conveniently sat next to Harry. His sisters are on their best behaviour, even if he caught them staring at Harry a couple of times.

The dinner wasn’t as bad as Louis expected. Harry wasn’t like most alphas, rough and dominant. He seemed shy and awkward at times, like he was trying too hard to get Louis to like him.

It made Louis uncomfortable because he was used to alphas asserting their role around him pretty fast. Harry seemed more interested in getting to know Louis on a friendly basis, asking him about his favourite movies and bands but also what he did for fun in Doncaster. And it wasn’t that Louis minded it, he’d just expected something else. He’s used to defending himself from the hopeless stereotype that surrounds omegas, since he is loud and brash. He just didn’t know how to act around Harry.

 

 

 

At first Harry was deeply worried that Louis disliked him so much he couldn’t even speak to him. Louis, who looked like a magical little prince with his hair and bright eyes, beautiful curves and stunning cheekbones.

His thoughts were interrupted when he saw Louis blush and a primal proud feeling erupted from his heart. It was shocking and a bit scary, he’d never felt these alpha feelings toward anyone before and he wasn’t sure what he thought about it.

They made him want to take Louis away from family and friends so that his attention would never leave Harry. They also made him want to growl at the mere thought that Louis would ever be in a situation where he wasn't physically near Harry.

But Harry had to be civilised and polite if he was going to be able to woo Louis. Because it was like his stepfather had said, even if they were promised to each other, nothing was set in stone and Louis could always end it before the mating ceremony.

So he used the dinner as an excellent way to ask Louis about, well everything about him. He found out that Louis loved drama and acting. His favourite sport was football and his favourite movie was Grease. His favourite franchise was Marvel and he really wasn't a fan of DC comics (if the look he gave Harry when he said that Superman was his favourite hero was anything to go by). In Doncaster it was popular to bowl and play pool but also going for a coffee or movies. Louis preferred to play football, either on the field or on the Xbox, or even at his friends’ houses. Harry longed for his pack to come so he could introduce everyone to Louis.

The dinner was alright, a bit stilted at times but overall a success. Louis looked stunning in his white shirt and braces and Harry felt gone. The small blush that never left his cheeks made Harry's heart ache.

After desert Louis’s sisters started getting tired, most noticeable in their cranky behaviour. When everyone was busy tying their shoes and putting on their jackets, Harry got the courage and asked for Louis’s number.

He didn't kiss or hug Louis goodbye, seeing as he was holding a sleeping sister in his arms. But he waved, the small smile he got back more than enough.

“So, what do you think?” his mother excitedly said as soon as she closed the door.

“I think he's beautiful, mum”

“But Louis, wow, he’s so pretty.”

“Louis he looked so nice do you think he’s nice?”

“Louis did you notice…?”

“Louis do you think….?”

The car ride was torture, finally meeting Harry and his family… all the new experiences were killing him inside. His sisters no longer acted like they were tired and started shouting questions to him. The noise hurt his ears and looking at Daniel who was driving he noticed the feeling was mutual.

“Girls, leave your brother alone for a bit. It must have been overwhelming enough. He doesn't need all these questions from you.”

A collective moan could be heard but then they started talking to each in a more normal tone. Louis stared out of the window and soon they were home.

When they all started walking he felt a small hand grasp his. “But honestly Louis, his hair was a bit weird. How are you supposed to kiss someone looking like that?” Daisy asked, concerned. Apparently not all of the girls were impressed.

“You'll understand when you grow up,” Louis winked at her and she looked unhappy. They all walked into the house and started getting ready for bed. Before Louis could do the same his mother led him to the kitchen and made them some tea. They talked a bit, or his mother asked him questions and he answered. He told her that he did give Harry his number but also confessed that he didn't want to check his phone. His mother just laughed and told him to do so in the morning.

But when Louis was lying in bed he couldn't sleep. Finally he got his phone from the pocket of his trousers on the floor. Once he was safe in bed, he saw one notification on his phone.

 

_It was a pleasure finally meeting you. I hope you feel the same. The pictures didn't do you justice. Goodnight and sweet dreams. Harry xx_

 

Louis stomach was filled with butterflies and he wanted to hide from his phone. It was so cheesy and cliché and, at the same time, made him all warm and fuzzy inside. He had to take a few deep breaths before he could reply.

 

 

 

It had been a week and most of Harry's pack had moved to Doncaster. That meant that Harry was spending all his time helping his friends unpacking and renovating, which was nice and all, but Louis wanted to hang out. Louis was finally texting with the boy that would become his husband one day but texting wasn’t the same as meeting.

Louis had found out a lot of things after texting with Harry. One: Harry typed in full sentences. Always. Two: He didn't use emoji’s or smileys even though they both had an iPhone. Sometimes, he'd type :) but it wasn’t a regular thing. Three: During the daytime Harry could be very slow texting back.

Thankfully the football fields are always filled with kids and even if Louis would soon be 18 it's still nice to help the younger ones practise. Sometimes Liam would join and they'd have mock teams.

Even though texting was nice and Louis didn't mind, Harry hadn't said anything about meeting up again and Louis wasn't sure if he should initiate something. He wouldn't mind, he didn't need to be wooed but he didn't think it was customary, seeing as he was an omega.

In fact, he's whining to Liam, asking for help but Liam being a beta wasn't very helpful. Mostly because he'd never have to go through the trouble himself, since betas never got arranged marriage.

“Maybe he really is busy Louis? I mean, we haven't see anyone from the new pack doing anything else except being around their houses.” Liam was lying against the grass and his voice was a little distant. Louis didn't like it one bit. This was serious and Liam wasn't acting like it.

“But still Liam we text all the time. And he's all like goodnight, can't wait to see you again, thinking about you bla bla.” Louis said while looking at his phone.

“And?”

Oh Liam is really pushing it. “What do you mean and?”

“And what do you reply? Because I hope you don't text him the same way you text me.”

“‘Course I don’t.” Louis mumbled as he sat up, busy replying to the text he had just gotten from Harry. Liam shifted so that he could look at Louis without getting the sun in his eyes.

“I think you should tell him to come and play a match with us. Tell him to bring a friend too.” he said after a moment of silence.

Louis looked up from his phone, the wind blowing a pleasant breeze across his face. It was a nice day but it still wasn’t crowded on the footie field. “Are you sure?” Louis asked as he looked around, “it’s not really customary, is it?”

“No, but, you don’t care about that stuff do you? I wanna meet him.” Liam gave Louis a look and then stood up to join the others.

Louis was left sitting alone with a water bottle and his phone. Fuck this. He typed out a text to Harry, waited a bit nervously for his reply and then dropped his phone on the ground so he could join the others. He needed to do something, Harry was on his way.

To say that Harry wasn't having the time of his life would be an understatement. He hadn't really had time to enjoy summer since the move, always busy with helping the others in his pack. He didn't mind but he'd really missed just hanging out with his friends.

He brought Niall and Zayn along to play footie, even though they all preferred to play Fifa. Zayn was his best and oldest friend. Niall befriended them about five years ago when his parents moved to the U.S. in order to join their pack. Their dads were all co-workers.

So, right now, they were playing on the same team as Louis and Liam. Both of them had seemed happy having two alphas and one beta on their team but looking at the field he could see their happiness was short lived.

They had agreed on a 10 minute break. Liam and Zayn were sitting on a bench talking, Liam looking sweaty and energetic and Zayn looking bored but appearing to be listening. Niall was standing around a circle with Louis and some other guys, probably Stan and Luke and others he didn’t know yet. The rest were scattered around.

Thing is, Harry wanted to go over to Louis. He really did. But Louis loved football and Harry didn't usually play a bad set yet today he was terrible and he just wanted to make a good impression. So he chickened out and went over to Liam and Zayn.

“...and then Louis and I got detention, oh hi Harry,” said a surprised Liam. Zayn just looked at him with an unimpressed stare.

“Why aren't you with Louis and Niall? It looks like they're having fun,” Zayn asked. They looked over to them and indeed, both Louis and Niall were wiping their eyes from laughter. Harry didn't know what to say so he just sat there quietly while Liam continued with his story.

Liam quieted down and Harry looked at them again. Both Liam and Zayn were looking at him intently. “Did I miss something?”

“I said I don't think he'd mind, he's just unsure. I mean, it's an unusual situation. No one knows how to behave,” Liam said and Harry was at a loss for words. Zayn hummed and they both looked at him.

“That's a hint Harry,” Zayn said when Harry failed to respond. His voice was strong, stronger than before. He was trying to get Harry to be more dominant and manlier… and the worst part was that Harry couldn't be mad because right now Louis was the one taking all the initiative.

The referee blew the whistle and shouted that it was time to go back to the game. Louis went with Niall to his place as attacker. Harry stayed at his place as defender. A few minutes into the game, Zayn jogged over once more.

“So what's your strategy?” He asked quietly. Harry just shrugged. He’d been too distracted to form a strategy. “I think, after the game, you should get him alone. Like, he’s bonding too much with Niall. One would think they’re engaged and not you.”

Harry got angry. He had a fiancé who barely knew him. But Louis was still _his_ fiancé. The growl was a natural reaction, the thought of someone else getting to know Louis _better_ was enough to make him see red.

He growled the same time as the attackers from the other team were directing the ball over to their goal. They didn’t have time to continue their conversation. Suddenly it was all about the game and it was deadly serious. Niall tried to tell them off when there was a penalty for the other team but they pretended not to listen.

After the game, which ended with a tie, he saw Liam talking to Louis. Zayn was currently standing with Niall and most likely retelling the conversation they had before. Niall looked at Harry and then to Louis and mimicked go over to him in an exaggerated way.

Harry decided to take a chance and walked over to the bench Liam and Louis were sitting on. They both noticed him approaching and Liam smiled before walking away. Louis looked nervous as Harry took Liam’s place.

“So, I was thinking… Do you wanna take a walk?” Louis nodded and they both stood up. “I don’t know this town so I guess you’re leading the way,” he said and mentally scolded himself. This conversation sounded so stiff.

“It’s okay,” Louis said as they started to walk away in silence. After a couple of deep breaths and glances, Harry took Louis’s hand in his. Louis looked at their hands and then at him.

“Did you have fun?” he smiled and Harry smiled back. “Yeah, ‘course, did you?”

“It would’ve been nice if we’d won, but Niall says you all are better at fifa,” Louis said absentmindedly and squeezed his hand. Harry squeezed back.

“Well you’re welcome to join anytime,” Harry couldn’t help answering, no matter how cheesy it sounded. Louis giggled, probably thinking it sounded stupid too. “I’m sorry, that was… a bit tacky.”

Louis just shook his head and pointed to a clearing by the hills. “Let’s sit here.” They both sat down across from each other, Harry with his legs crossed and Louis with his stretched out. When he started to speak, it all came out rushing.

“This feels strange, don’t you think so? Like, I don’t know you but I’ve known about you all my life. And I know that one day we’ll get married and have kids but this middle part, I don’t know what we are supposed to do right now.” Louis took a deep breath and continued, “it’s the part no-one told us about, right? Everyone just told me that when we'd meet it would all work out, like, we’d just fall in love. And it's so weird because even though I've known about you all my life I don't know you. And after meeting you I don't know if I'm feeling all these things because I'm supposed to be feeling them or if they are real. I don’t know what I’m feeling or if I’m supposed to be feeling something. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. This is all very confusing to be honest.” Louis ended with a hollow laugh.

Harry’s chest hurt with the need to comfort this beautiful creature. He leaned forward and Louis pulled his legs to his chest and rested his head on his knees, one of his hands by the grass, the other under his head.

“Louis,” Harry said, while taking his hand and interlocking their fingers, “it’s… it’s just us yeah? This is between you and me. So it doesn’t, it doesn't matter what you're supposed to do or what you feel somebody is expecting you to do. I don't care about anything like that and neither should you! I think, I don't know what we're supposed to do either but I am excited to find it out with you.”

Louis looked at him with a sad smile. “I ruined everything didn’t I?”

“No, I think it’s good that we had this talk. I don't ever want you to apologise for something that you want to do or say. Just take today for example, I was so busy and I didn't even think about doing something else for the day and then you texted me and I had an amazing time and now I get to spend some time alone with you. I do think this is really nice. Don't you think so too?”

“Yeah… I do.” they smiled at each other and Harry really hoped this was for the better. They changed the subject, asking each other questions like “worst family dinner” or “most embarrassing moment”. Louis didn’t let go of his hand and neither did Harry. Not even when they laid down or went home.

Later that night when Harry was in bed he couldn’t help but look back at the moment in the park. Even if Louis spoke quickly and from the heart, it still felt like he wasn’t saying the whole truth. Because that kind of sadness couldn’t be just from him worrying if he was a good omega. It was strange, because everyone, even Zayn and Niall, would always tell him he wasn’t acting alpha enough. But with Louis, the need to protect, cherish… and love would sometimes feel overpowering. And Louis made him feel like he did things right, there was no judgement in his eyes. Perhaps it would be better if it was just the two of them. He decided to send one last text even though it was late at night.

 

 

 

It did get easier. And because it got easier, Louis couldn’t help but become frightened. Summer had passed by quickly. Harry started showing up more and more as his pack started to settle in and thus, his responsibilities lessened. Louis found out that Harry was more of a quiet person compared to himself. He can’t help but get jealous of Niall and Zayn because they knew him better. Louis wanted to be the centre of his attention all the time, make up for lost time. He wanted hugs and kisses – but Harry was too polite for that.

They had their first kiss after a party, where Louis had dropped hint after hint but Harry had just smiled. Harry had finally kissed him after Danielle, Liam’s mate, had told Harry he was being mean for not kissing Louis. The kiss was amazing, all he ever wanted and neither of them had wanted to stop, Louis had found out afterwards.

Liam had known his mate Danielle for all of their lives and they were not only mates but also best friends. They shared a bond Louis restlessly hoped for and craved.

He realised this when they were at a friend from school’s big house party. Harry had been nothing but nice all summer but they were still only _friends_. They’d gone for countless dinners and even to the movies, but Harry was so fucking nice that he never did anything else except hold his hand or perhaps sling an arm around his waist or shoulders. It was depressing because Louis was waiting for something to happen.

The music was loud inside and Louis tried to get Harry to dance but it didn’t work. He danced alone with his classmates and temporarily forgot Harry, until he saw him exit the house with Zayn. It shouldn’t have bothered him as much as it did but Zayn got Harry in a way Louis didn’t.

He went outside after a while and saw them along with others sitting on the patio. Zayn was sitting next to the door, making out with his mate. Niall was sitting on the floor with some girls that he’d never seen before and the rest of the people were scattered around. In the corner he saw Liam in a chair next to Harry. Danielle was also sitting in his lap. They were laughing and Harry was holding a beer in one hand and his phone in the other.

Louis walked over and greeted them. Before he checked Harry’s reaction, he sat down on his lap. It was a bold move, they hadn’t been physical around each other. Harry put his arm around him and adjusted him to make them more comfortable.

They started to talk about new movies they wanted to see and what shows were good on Netflix. Harry gave him his beer but didn’t really do much else. It was frustrating because all around him couples were being coupley and Harry was doing nothing. Not even a kiss on the cheek or a stroke to his hand or whatever.

Danielle started talking about her dance routines. Her dance team had just come home from a month of touring all over England for competitions. It all sounded interesting but Louis was getting drunk and bored. He took Harry’s hand, looking at their matching rings. Harry took the move as a sign of hand holding and linked their fingers together.

Thing was, Louis was bored of holding hands. He was bored of this conversation. Truth of it all, he was done with this, whatever it was.

He started to fidget, leaning down on Harry’s upper body. Genetics were very kind to him as it was a really nice torso and Louis tried to sigh but instead let out an omega whine. Harry’s hand squeezed his but his attention never left Danielle. He was just about to get up and get another beer when Harry held him closer and whispered, “stop, I can’t focus.”

“Whatever,” is all he said when he got up. Harry didn't let go of his arm and Liam asked him what was going on, but he didn't want to talk about it, nor be here anymore.

Louis stood up too fast and got a little bit dizzy. He tried to find his jacket but gave up, he didn't remember where he’d left it. He looked down, thankful he still had his shoes on.

He found Stan inside and gave it one last try. Harry hadn't walked after him and even if he was behaving like a drama queen it still hurt.

They found it and Louis took one last shot. It didn't feel as good as the last one and he decided to walk home. He told Stan goodbye and started to walk, singing quietly to himself. Until a hand grabbed his arm from behind.

“Louis why don't you answer your phone? I've been looking everywhere for you. Stan just told me you left?” Harry looked out of breath, too much for the short run he just did.

Louis opened his mouth to respond but no words left his mouth, only a squeaky sound. When he closed his eyes he felt tears and Harry's arms around him. Harry's breath sounded shaky by his ear, overwhelming him.

He stood limply in Harry's arms. What was going on? Why was he crying?

He heard Harry's voice trying to be soothing and he faintly heard words like ‘baby’ and ‘darling’ but it was hard to focus. When his tears slowed down and his breathing started to return to normal, he felt rather than heard Harry's voice.

“What's wrong? Talk to me please.”

It was a desperate plea and Harry meant well. He was a very kind person, Louis knew that. But something went off in his head and before he knew what he was doing, he pushed Harry away.

Harry hadn’t expected it so he immediately released Louis. He looked as surprised as Louis felt. Louis tried to blink his tears away and Harry made a move to come forward again, but Louis only held up his hand and said, “don't”.

“What's going on…”

“No. Stop. Don’t touch me. I can't do this anymore.” The words left his mouth before he could stop them. Harry looked heartbroken. Louis was having trouble focusing on his face and he was starting to feel nauseous.

He turned around and started to walk back. He felt and heard Harry’s presence and footsteps behind him. They walked in silence though the walk wasn’t long.

Louis was by the gate to his house when he heard Harry’s quiet, “stop”. He stopped but didn’t turn around. Harry didn’t say anything else and Louis felt bad. The walk cleared his mind up a bit but it was still confusing and it still hurt.

“I think we should take a break from each other,” he said and quickly added, “not like, see others or anything,” when he saw Harry’s shaken look. “It’s just, I think I need some space.”

Harry’s voice shook as he asked, “space from what? Me?” sounding so broken that Louis wanted to cry again. Knowing that he was causing them both pain was incomprehensible. He tried to hold them back and think of a response when he saw Harry’s eyes getting wet. They weren’t standing far away from each other and Louis felt as though he had just broken something.

He shook his head and whispered, “us”. Harry opened his mouth, looking like he was going to walk towards Louis and Louis just _couldn’t_ anymore.

It was two in the morning and his whole house was asleep. Louis turned and ran inside. He waited for Harry to leave and then slowly went to bed.

When he was sure no one was awake and could hear him, he started and continued to cry until he fell asleep.


End file.
